If that statement is true I'm a real amazing woman. Work has been so slow that I haven't even made $50 in 3 days of working. Rent is due on the 5th and I know that I won't have the money for that. Car insurance is due on the 4th and I don't even think I will have the money for that either. I'm stressed. I have looked for a new job for 3 weeks now and nothing has called me back. I don't know what I'm going to do anymore. I'm not worried about food or my utilities just worried about rent and car insurance.

The only good exciting news that I've heard was that my school funds kicked in and will cover the $1900 that I owe. And I might get a refund back but I don't and won't know how much until sometime after the 12th of December. Hopefully it will cover the overdrawn fee in my account and get me into a positive balance. I pray for at least $600 back. At least then I can start saving for January's rent. I need a new job bad. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. I have worked with people for as long as I had a job. I deal with people every single day at Lone Star. I'm outgoing and always smiling. I'm friendly and polite. I'm a hard worker. Why can't I catch a break?

It started off with a hitch. I got up and cleaned up a bit before my parents came over. I finally cooked dinner around 4:30 and made turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, corn, green beans and stuffing. YUMMY! When my parents came over I only then remembered that I had a WIC appt yesterday. As I told you all before I invited Greg over and I'm not surprised that he didn't come. I did speak to him a little yesterday. Anyways, Johnny came over and I did homework. I hope that I get good grades for the next two weeks and pass my final. Well, bed time. Love you all. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.

I didn't sleep the greatest because I was worried about my car again. Thank goodness it was still there right where I left it. I check my phone as usual because sometimes I get texts or missed calls during my sleeping hours. I had one from John and it he said that he had just got fired from his job because of yesterday. My heart sunk deep into my chest. I felt really bad for him. So, now I'm doing whatever it takes for him to get another job and to help out the best I could. I gave him a bag of canned goods that I knew that I wouldn't eat unless I was about to make the choice of eating my right arm or eat the mixed veggies. It didn't have to much just because I don't have enough as it is. I can't give him money because I need it just as bad if not more then he does. Meredith is still working full time so rent will still be paid. Not to sound selfish but I was kinda worried about my car and child support. I don't know I'm going to try and help him without getting myself in to deep.

Work sucked again. I only made $50 bucks. I even got stiffed. Why can't people just leave a dollar or something. ANYTHING! If anything I had to pay the bartender and the hostess for that table. I paid for that table. Thank God there bill was only $28. Anything more then that I would have been REALLY pissy.

Love life... Still sucks. I wish I could just find that guy that could give me more then just sex and money. I could do without it and have been for a while so whats up with that? Its just going to be another lonely holiday for me. UGH..

Back to homework that I didn't finish. I have to have passing grades this time around. I don't want to owe this school anymore money then I have too. I was just thinking... It sure would be nice to just have a huge check come in a Christmas card for me this year.

What a day, what a day. I made a appointment with Tracey my car guy this morning to get my tail light fixed. I don't want to go into what happened. So, I get up early, get the boys up and we walk outside to only notice my car is gone. Freaked out I call my mom. She said to call the police and my insurance company. I get off the phone and dial 911. The police officer shows up finally only to tell me that it has been prepossessed. I'm crying and shaking and pacing the floors because my car is gone. The only car that I have is gone. Thank God it wasn't stolen but still it was gone. I get a hold of John who was "suppose" to be taking care of my car payments fails to tell me that he must of missed a few payments. YOU THINK? I had things to do today. I didn't have time to be just sitting around. Johns parents came through and got me to work early so I could make some extra money and John finally came up to Lone Star with my keys. It cost him $1500 to get it out of the impound. I really felt bad. I still do. I know that he didn't have that kind of money. He looked sick and really depressed. I know that this wasn't my fault but still. In the end I got my car back the same day. I only made $32 bucks today at work. And I still have homework. What a day, what a day.

There really isn't anything to bitch about. I cut things off with Johnny. He just fails to get his crap together. I'm kinda talking to this guy Steve who's 31. He works on monster trucks. Kinda cool. I look past it really. He does a lot of traveling which would make a relationship really hard to do. I don't know. We are just talking so who knows.

I'm actively looking for a better job. I filled out a few apps on Sunday and continue to do it again this Sunday. With Thanksgiving coming up and Christmas I'm sure that stores need extra help. I don't think I would quit Lone Star just really cut down my hours. Who knows. Alright well I did some homework so tomorrow I wouldn't have so much to do. Time for bed. Love you all.